Melissa Roth -- Freespeak Blog

Lately I have found myself challenged by identifying with others feelings instead of comparing circumstances.  I know this is a defect in me and my thinking.  I can rationally listen to someone cry in fright about the future and financial woes and know that their feelings are exactly like my feelings about money and the future.  I recognize it and I feel it, too.  At the same time, there is a small sad part of me that thinks because our circumstances are different, I am in a more pitiful state.  Ah, there's that old friend self pity.  I think I am past it, over it, beyond it's call, and then –poof- here it is again. I know that whether someone has savings, pensions, social security, IRA's, or income that I do not have, when faced with an uncertain future, health challenges,  the accompanying medical bills, and the increasing cost of living, the fear is real.  The key is that the facts may be different, but the truth is the same for each of us...

I haven't blogged much lately.  It has not been for lack of ideas.  It has been too many ideas.  I have had difficulty bringing them together into cohesive blogs.  They hit like big fat raindrops and before I can catch the thought – the next raindrop hits.  It is wonderful to have all my creative engines firing.  Now, if I can focus the energy into one direction at a time I will be able to get something done. I had to maneuver the minefields of obtaining health insurance and attend various doctor appointments over the last two months.  I see a direct correlation between having health insurance, using Western medicine, and how many doctor appointments I have.  I have had insurance for 2 years and I have been to see more doctors, had more scans and x-rays, appliances, physical therapy, and diagnoses than in the previous 20 years.  I am willing to admit that by not going to the doctor some things may have been percolating and have just ...