What a Lease

I have never owned a home.  I have always rented.  In my life, I have probably signed 15-20 leases.  Today, I was presented with a lease the likes of which I have never seen.  It was 33 pages long.  Thirty-three pages of rules, procedures, warnings, and instructions.

This lease instructs me to put ice through the garbage disposal once a week.  This lease tells me I must never put the a/c below 68 and the heat never below 65.  This lease explains how I must water, fertilize, and pesticide the lawn or face dire consequences.  This lease allows for one key for the house which will be in the lockbox on the door which I get the combination to on the first day of the lease.  One key.  There is a garage but no mention in the 33 pages of a garage door opener.  There is mention of a mailbox key for which I am told to find the nearest post office and get one there.  

This lease includes a paragraph and a half telling me how to use the broiler.  I must leave the door to the over partially open and put water in the bottom of the broiler pan.  This lease tells me to buy a fire extinguisher and learn how to use it.  This lease tells me what size picture hangers I can put in the walls and only that size and no screws or nails.  This lease tells me how often I need to change the a/c filter.  This lease tells me what wattage and kind of light bulbs must be used. 

In order to pay the rent we make a deposit directly to their account, but if there is not enough information there will be a fee.  This lease details fines and penalties for numerous actions including visitors over 3 days, smoking, ants, lack of watering the lawn, not changing the a/c filter often enough, and not enough information on the deposit slip.  The penalties are clear but what exactly constitutes an infraction and who decides is not. 

Repairs can only be requested in writing but no address is provided.  There is a phone number and it is emphasized that the phone number is only to be used for emergencies.  And this lease clearly states that a broken a/c or heater is not an emergency.  It says, and I quote, “it is an inconvenience but not life threatening.” 

My reaction at first on reading this lease was astonishment and indignation.  I never saw such specifics in a lease before and I never saw those kinds of things listed.  I had questions and I felt overwhelmed.  How was I going to follow all those rules and what if I broke one?  Each rule has an accompanying fine for breaking it.  Would I have to make a checklist of all the instructions?  Put postit notes all over the house?

I understand that they have probably had some bad experiences and they don’t know me, know us, from Adam.  I am used to meeting my landlord in person or at least the property manager, but that is not the case here.  It is all handled electronically – including electronic signature.  So, they may have reasons for all these rules. Still, it feels damn intimidating.  And I feel pretty unwelcome. 

My husband and I are good tenants.  We don’t smoke, we don’t have pets, we don’t have wild parties, and we pay the rent on time.  We take care of the property.  And as we are self-employed, there is someone home most of the time.  In Victoria, that made a difference.  Here in Austin, it is such a tight housing market that personal details don’t seem to matter.  And maybe I am just taking it all too personally.  The fact that there are many many applicants and such constant turnover means that people tend to get treated like another person in line at the checkout of a big box store.    

I have wrestled with my feelings about all this most of the night and have had very little sleep or peace.  How I respond to challenges is the true test of my beliefs.  I claim to believe in the expectation of good.  I claim to believe that I am being guided to my good at all times.  Yet, I see a pattern of thinking things are difficult here in Austin.  Thinking things are hard instead of flowing.  Does that mean that if my attitude changes here and I start to think it can flow, it will.  That I just believe that I can easily follow all these rules and be comfortable.  Can I believe that I will feel like this is "our" home?  I am open to guidance and I am asking for help.  I asked a few questions before signing this lease.  I asked if I could hang curtains because that is deal breaker for me.  Curtains provide insulation and privacy.  I also asked about a garage door opener.  We’ll see what the answers are and go from there.  I like the house and we would like to live there and now it remains to be seen if the landlord would like us to live there.   As my husband always says, 'this or better'.