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Circular Staircase

I had an interesting awareness this week.  I get into these spirals sometimes where I am so down on myself.  Like I just keep coming around the bend and there I am at the same old issue-I'm not good enough, I'm not enough, I'm a failure-basically any of these cliché themes.  I just go around and around the circle to keep running into the same walls, facing the same challenges, fighting the same character defects.   It feels so futile to keep trying at times like that. 

This week I was in that place again.  And then I read something about a circular staircase and it completely changed my viewpoint.  There are so many times that it feels like I am moving in circles.  There are themes or lessons that keep coming around in life and although I see that it feels like it is the same and I am going in circles – it is really a circular staircase. 

Yes, I come around the curve to meet the same issue but I am at a higher level.  I am in a new place with the old defect.  It might still be about self-pity but I am approaching it in a new way, a new angle, a shorter time to sink, a shorter time to come to self-awareness, a new insight.  I have evolved and learned.  I am making progress.  I just haven't completely gotten through my dark part of the forest.  I haven't mastered the lesson or made the change in my life. 


Looking at my life, my issues, character defects, habits, and goals through the prism of a circular staircase completely changes how I see my path.  I am moving around and gaining each time, going higher and higher.  I am moving toward the light – enlightenment.  What I have been practicing this week to help me keep it in my mind is a physical reminder.  I stand and plant my feet shoulder width apart and ground.  I see the roots or rods go deep into the Earth from my feet and feel my connection.  Then I slowly move in a circular motion and feel my upward movement spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.  I am on the circular staircase of my life and when I look down, I see I have come a long long way.  It is a nice view and gives me the perspective and confidence to resume the climb. 
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  1. Dennis TardanJune 15, 2014 at 9:23 AM

    Since you shared this insight with me, I've been able to take a much more compassionate view of myself and my journey, especially when I come back around on my staircase and face-to-face with a defect of yore. Yes, I am not the same person and I am not at the same elevation. It's all perspective and you've given me a fresher way of looking at my path.

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