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I Claim My Feelings Sans Explanations

Self doubt is an interesting thing.   To not trust yourself with the most mundane and important thing imaginable-your own needs.  For instance, I feel hot but I don't believe I should be hot, so I go check the thermostat.  What is that about?  It is about not trusting myself, not believing I matter.  To be so disrespectful of myself as to discount my own feelings unless there is a good reasons to have them, is a betrayal of self.   It is believing in a circumstance outside of me-some arbitrary standard-instead of my own reality.

If I am hungry, tired, cold, thirsty, sad, angry, frustrated, or happy-I can learn to accept that is how I feel and not look to find a "reason" why I feel that way.  Feelings don't make sense.  They don't follow a pattern of logic.  They just are.  Feelings are not dependent on external conditions. 

Yet, I find myself trying to make them fit into a checklist of excuses, reasons, or rationalizations.  I can be tired whether I had enough sleep or not.  The conditions inside me are the ones I need to pay attention to.  I don't need an excuse for any feeling I have, what I need is to listen to my body, my mind, my feelings and accept.  It is only through accepting my feelings without judgment that I can then address the corresponding need.

If I feel tired, I can rest.  If I feel hot, I can turn up the a/c.  If I feel sad, I can write or cry or ask for a hug.  It is impossible to address my needs unless I acknowledge my needs.  And looking for a reason why I have the need before it is acceptable, is detrimental to my mental and spiritual wellbeing.  I respect myself and I trust my perception of reality.  I claim my feelings with no explanations.

The feeling of joy in the freedom from explanations is visceral.  I am.  I feel.  I state.  I care.  I trust.  I am worth believing.   And so it is.

Comments

  1. Thank you for helping me to separate my feelings from my logic and that they are two separate threads in my life's tapestry. I confuse them, to the peril of my peace of mind.

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