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Brilliance in the Night - Lost in the Morning Light

Just a note about my notes:

I am always thinking.  My brain churns away night and day.  There is a constant conversation, flood of ideas, things to check on, to-do lists, creative plans, social connections, and the maintenance of life details. 

The plus side is that I have a rich inner life and I love the feeling of creativity.  The burst of energy and excitement that comes when a thought floats through my brain and I go 'aha'.   The down side is that it is tiring.  I have had more than one person tell me that I wear them out with the constant flow of questions, ideas, and plans.  It is tiring for me, too.  I am often exhausted by the end of the day.  When my husband tells me to stop he cannot listen to any more, I tell him, "hey, you should be in my brain."  That usually makes us laugh because it is so true.  

Yet, I find after a few hours of sleep I will wake up with new ideas, things to research, blog topics, or creative inspiration.  I tumble out of bed and stumble to the pad and pen on the dresser (without light or glasses) and make a note.  Ah, now I can go back to sleep knowing my brilliance was not wasted.

Come morning I check my pad and "what the hell does that say?" is my reaction more often than not.  First, my penmanship in the light of day, wide awake, with glasses on, and with all the time in the world, is barely legible.  So, you can only imagine how much worse it is in my nighttime notes.   

And when I can read the note, often it doesn't make sense.  I write one or two words thinking this will be simple and I will remember.  Then I see the two words—specific bird—and think, what does that mean?  I have to trust that any ideas that I need to express will come back to me.  After all, I am always thinking and surely they are not all new thoughts.  I probably have the same ones in a continuous loop or variations of them. 


Last night, I tried something different.  I just gave up on the two word notes and got up.  I put on my glasses, turned on the light and wrote out several paragraphs with my ideas.  Low and behold, in the morning I was able to research an event, write a blog (from the topic I thought of in the night), and remember to email a friend based on my expanded notes.  And as a plus, after I had written the notes, I was able to relax and go back to sleep with a clear mind.  I believe I have stumbled upon a new method to deal with the energizer engine of my creative brain.  

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