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Listening To My Body


I have heard myself say things like, "I used to be able to stay up all night and go all day, or I never had any back pain when I…, or I could drive for hours or eat a whole pizza or …". The specific example isn't important. The lie behind it is.

I, and I believe many of us, tend to think that we did all these things when we were young with no effect because we didn't experience the hangover or back pain or sore joints or weight gain or acid reflux or foggy brain or fatigue. I believed my body was indestructible. I was strong and young and fearless. Any consequences were years away.

Lately I have found myself thinking my body just wore out, got old, ceased to function properly anymore. Because now when I stay up too late, I feel it all the next day. When I push myself physically doing manual labor, I feel it in my joints and muscles. I finally realized the truth.

And the truth is that the treatment I gave my body was never something I "got away with", it always was damaging and harmful to my body and mind. The effects were simply DELAYED. I am feeling the cumulative consequences of a lifetime of mistreatment and abuse.

There is nothing I can do about the past. What I can do now is to stop punishing my body. I want to do what I can to stay healthy and strong. And I want to stop feeling the effects, which is often a stronger incentive. Am I really ready to stop "pushing" myself to the limit? Yes, yet, old habits die hard. The urge to push just a little bit more or longer is strong.

So, what I am practicing now is letting some things go. I am paying attention to the signals my body is sending me and stopping when I feel tired or stiff, taking breaks, getting to bed at reasonable times, and asking for help when something is too much for me physically. I am listening and caring for me. And the great news is that I am already feeling the positive effects. I am in a better humor, calmer, moving easier, and more able to live my life.

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