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Hair Identity


I am having an identity crisis.  I hate my hairstyle and I cannot figure out what to change about it.  It is uneven and unsightly and growing out in strange twirls and spurts.  That's not really the problem though, it's the inability to settle on a change, heck to even decide on what I want to change, and do it. 

For me, as many women, my hairstyle is an expression of my personality.  It tells the world something about me, something I want to say about myself and my lifestyle.  My hair has to be easy to fix, not a lot of product or prep time.  It is fine so no elaborate styles.  And most of all I need some blonde.  I feel better when I have some blonde in my hair.  I feel more like me. 

Right now, my hair doesn't feel like me and I am not sure what will reflect my current state of mind.  I do know that the unwillingness to make a commitment is part of the problem.  I am not sure what my lifestyle is right now, what is it I am yearning to express to the world.  I know that here in Austin I feel more relaxed about having to have my hair meet some proscribed standard.  I know that I feel more like I don't have to meet a proscribed standard.  So that tells me I want something more loose.   

I feel like I am the blank space between the lines.  There is something there but I cannot see it.  I'm not sure who I want to be and what I want my life to look like but I do know that I don't like what I see in the mirror every day because it doesn't feel like me.  I want a magic mirror to show me what I want to see.  Except that is not how the universe responds. 

I get to decide what I want the mirror to show by acknowledging who I am and who I want to present to the world.  Just do it.  No decision is permanent.  I know I don't want my statement to the world to be "here is a person who needs a haircut."  

I want the mirror to show I am clean, easy-going, bright, and vibrant.  I think I just described my new hairstyle.

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